Play is how children begin to understand social interaction. As they move through different stages of play, they develop the communication, cooperation, and problem-solving skills that form the basis of friendships.
I’m Jennifer Hatch, a pediatric occupational therapist at Fluens Children’s Therapy. In this article, I’ll walk you through the stages of play, explain what they teach children about social interaction, and share how occupational therapy can help children learn to connect with peers.
The Stages of Play
Social skills don’t appear overnight; they develop gradually as children gain experience sharing space, taking turns, and learning to collaborate. Through play, children strengthen focus, creativity, and emotional regulation, which are all essential for connecting with others.
Each stage of play supports a child’s growth in social awareness, communication, and emotional connection. Understanding these stages can help parents recognize where their child is developmentally and what kind of play experiences will help them progress.
- Unoccupied Play (Birth – 3 Months): In the earliest months, babies engage in unoccupied play, such as tummy time, stretching, kicking, and exploring movement. This stage lays the groundwork for motor development and curiosity about their surroundings.
- Solitary Play (Birth – 2 Years): During this time, children play alone with toys such as blocks, stacking cups, or puzzles. They’re learning concentration, hand-eye coordination, and fine motor control. Solitary play also helps children learn to enjoy their own company, a key part of healthy development.
- Onlooker Play (Around 2 Years): At this stage, children begin to watch other kids play but don’t yet join in. It may look like they’re just observing from a distance, but they’re actually developing social awareness by noticing what peers are doing and beginning to understand group dynamics.
- Parallel Play (Ages 2 – 3): Parallel play happens when children play next to each other, often with similar toys or activities, but without direct interaction. This stage teaches comfort around peers and the early skills of sharing space, an important stepping-stone toward future cooperation.
- Associative Play (Ages 3 – 4): During associative play, children start to talk to one another, share materials, and imitate each other’s actions. They’re still doing their own thing but are becoming aware of teamwork, conversation, and turn-taking.
- Cooperative Play (Ages 4+): In this stage, children begin to work toward shared goals, like building a tower together or playing make-believe with assigned roles. Cooperative play builds true social connection, emotional regulation, and empathy.
How Occupational Therapy Helps Build Social Skills
Occupational therapy helps children strengthen the foundational skills they need for communication, cooperation, and friendship. Here’s how therapists guide that process step by step.
Starting with Observation and Assessment
If a child needs help building social or play skills, occupational therapy begins by identifying where they are in the developmental sequence and what supports they need to grow. Therapists start by observing how a child engages with toys, peers, and adults.
Building Skills Through Play-Based Activities
Using what they learn from observation, occupational therapists design play-based activities that strengthen communication, motor coordination, and emotional regulation, all of which support healthy friendships.
Practicing Social Skills in Groups and One-on-One
Some children benefit from small-group therapy sessions, where they can practice turn-taking, problem-solving, and sharing in a structured environment. Others might work one-on-one first to build confidence before joining group activities.
Encouraging Social Growth at Home
Parents can encourage progress by giving their children opportunities to practice social interaction, such as visiting a playground, attending sibling events, or inviting a peer for playtime. Little by little, these everyday experiences help children feel more comfortable and confident around others.
Reach Out to Fluens Children’s Therapy for Help
If your child needs support with social skills, Fluens Children’s Therapy can help. Call (253) 212-3502 to schedule an appointment or request a free 15-minute online or in-person screening. You can also contact us through our website.